- Sun Oct 10, 2010 9:12 pm
#347786
Here I am on the gulf coast in the saltwater that I consider home. The "hootch" turns into appalachicola and dumps into the gulf here. I have spent lots of time here living in a tent, shucking oysters, shrimping, and chasing redfish. I proposed to my wife here a long time ago and have retreated here many times.
Tomorrow is a special day. Tomorrow will be sixteen years since I held my wife and my firstborn in my arms and prayed for mercy........oh dear mercy. The lord had different plans and took my child away.
It was as bitter as it could possibly be. And I have spent countless hours of my life since that day trying to understand why. I have trusted even though I haven't understood.I can't say that it hasn't hurt but I can say that he is good and right and I know that he loves me and his plan is perfect.
Last night upon arriving we went out to eat and outside the restaurant my thirteen year old lost a ring I had just given her. It was my"promise ring" . A symbol of my promise as a dad to always love and take care of her......and she had lost it in the sand. We looked but it was dark and we were tired from travel. I promised her we would look in the morning.
I couldn't sleep . I was up at daylight . The owner of the resturaunt wished me luck but didn't give me much hope. He laughed when I told him I had all week to find my baby' s ring. He didn't understand.
I found it at fifteen after ten. I had moved about two pickup truck loads of sand with a plastic shovel .......I found it! And I cried. ....oh I cried.......because this time there was something I could do and goddammit I did it! And I'll never give up. Never.
I spent the rest of the morning with my four kids on the beach. We caught some whiting and missed a few crabs with the net . We burried little Bob up to his neck in the sand and watched a guy down the way land a nice pompano after a long fight. This afternoon I got out on the boat and despite a slow bite I got my redfish. A nice 24" beauty along with a raw index finger again from stripping the line.
Life is good and the Lord is good. Every day to me is a reminder.
I hope y'all understand.
B.M.
Tomorrow is a special day. Tomorrow will be sixteen years since I held my wife and my firstborn in my arms and prayed for mercy........oh dear mercy. The lord had different plans and took my child away.
It was as bitter as it could possibly be. And I have spent countless hours of my life since that day trying to understand why. I have trusted even though I haven't understood.I can't say that it hasn't hurt but I can say that he is good and right and I know that he loves me and his plan is perfect.
Last night upon arriving we went out to eat and outside the restaurant my thirteen year old lost a ring I had just given her. It was my"promise ring" . A symbol of my promise as a dad to always love and take care of her......and she had lost it in the sand. We looked but it was dark and we were tired from travel. I promised her we would look in the morning.
I couldn't sleep . I was up at daylight . The owner of the resturaunt wished me luck but didn't give me much hope. He laughed when I told him I had all week to find my baby' s ring. He didn't understand.
I found it at fifteen after ten. I had moved about two pickup truck loads of sand with a plastic shovel .......I found it! And I cried. ....oh I cried.......because this time there was something I could do and goddammit I did it! And I'll never give up. Never.
I spent the rest of the morning with my four kids on the beach. We caught some whiting and missed a few crabs with the net . We burried little Bob up to his neck in the sand and watched a guy down the way land a nice pompano after a long fight. This afternoon I got out on the boat and despite a slow bite I got my redfish. A nice 24" beauty along with a raw index finger again from stripping the line.
Life is good and the Lord is good. Every day to me is a reminder.
I hope y'all understand.
B.M.
"worst that can happen is a big fat zero and a fine walk out of doors"---Chadroc
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