A Confession

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austrotard
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Re: A Confession

Post by austrotard » Wed May 09, 2018 9:34 pm

confession: got winded off today.

relates: seriously. at home due to wind.

elates: not my own thankfully.

lates: carving perhaps. in the wind.

sate: and high as a monkey.
if you find yourself needing to be among like-minded people to feel safe your[sic] a moron, josh.

-anonymous mtice

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RFA
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Re: A Confession

Post by RFA » Thu May 10, 2018 8:59 am

Coming to the realization that every woman in my life from birth on has been an anchor around my neck.

Now we have to put them at the forefront of every activity they feign interest in. Because we all have skeletons in our closets, and don't want to get in trouble, like children.
As it turns out, God? He was a squirrel. A big 'ol meaty one. "I found god, he used to say"

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Spudnik
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Re: A Confession

Post by Spudnik » Wed May 16, 2018 9:58 pm

RFA wrote:
Thu May 10, 2018 8:59 am
Coming to the realization that every woman in my life from birth on has been an anchor around my neck.

Now we have to put them at the forefront of every activity they feign interest in. Because we all have skeletons in our closets, and don't want to get in trouble, like children.
Anchor rope* retrad.
"Do you think it is real? I bet it is hard and soft, like hard muscle but really smooth skin. I bet it is real nice." - midstream

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austrotard
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Re: A Confession

Post by austrotard » Sat May 19, 2018 3:29 am

confession: I'm having a royal weeding party tonight.

relates: I think it kicks off before the fa cup. fuck knows.

elates: united and chelsea.

lates: fuck chelsea.

sate: and fuck the royal wedding.

sat: in the park, smoking the weeding and getting royally fucked. I may not actually make the cup.
if you find yourself needing to be among like-minded people to feel safe your[sic] a moron, josh.

-anonymous mtice

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pbrstreetgang
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Re: A Confession

Post by pbrstreetgang » Sat May 19, 2018 10:08 pm

So nothing worked out for you then.

Fuck Manchester United.
Everybody knows this is nowhere...

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austrotard
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Re: A Confession

Post by austrotard » Sun May 20, 2018 9:18 pm

horseshit. we got a colonial sister in the royal fam damn.

merka royalty.
one should try it.
if you find yourself needing to be among like-minded people to feel safe your[sic] a moron, josh.

-anonymous mtice

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austrotard
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Re: A Confession

Post by austrotard » Sun May 27, 2018 5:42 am

confession: after dropping some btices at josh and angus stone (?) in freo I splashed some twats at the bus stop tonight.

relates: I'll prolly get reported.

elates: I was in my wife's gti.
if you find yourself needing to be among like-minded people to feel safe your[sic] a moron, josh.

-anonymous mtice

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austrotard
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Re: A Confession

Post by austrotard » Wed Jun 06, 2018 5:16 am

confession: I swear this time last week I wanted to blow my fucking brains out.

relates: and then this week it seems I need to hire two blokes.

elates: one cannot top oneself with a leaf blower.

lates: but stayed chooned for next week...

sate: ...for I also own a self loading technical* pencil.



*if it were tactical I'd kill everyone in the office**

** which is a room at the front of my house***

***which is not really my house****

****I need a better leafblower.





fuck youse guys. I sometimes fish.
if you find yourself needing to be among like-minded people to feel safe your[sic] a moron, josh.

-anonymous mtice

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austrotard
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Re: A Confession

Post by austrotard » Fri Jun 08, 2018 10:12 pm

confession: mitch bought two perfects in haste. 3 1/8 & 3 3/8

relates: rhw.

non-elates: mitch is lhw.

lates: non-convertibles

sate: line guards (as above): 70's brown agate; 50's silver agate.

eta: tuesday.
if you find yourself needing to be among like-minded people to feel safe your[sic] a moron, josh.

-anonymous mtice

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CC Riebeeck
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Re: A Confession

Post by CC Riebeeck » Sat Jun 09, 2018 8:02 am

Rank stupidity that
You have a b&w telly as well...hmmmmm...a dial-up modem?

I have a pre-war 3 7/8 expensive paper-weight.

I hate the rhw wankers that get all woody about "classic-spey"...

Offence, but then that seems the norm.
Consider it my encyclical.

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austrotard
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Re: A Confession

Post by austrotard » Sat Jun 09, 2018 6:55 pm

and it's not even a '71...

an honour killing is too good.
send my black cousin back to antrim.
if you find yourself needing to be among like-minded people to feel safe your[sic] a moron, josh.

-anonymous mtice

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Average Joe
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Re: A Confession

Post by Average Joe » Sat Jun 09, 2018 8:08 pm

I replaced a damaged cast iron kitchen sink today.

Along with a bunch of other stuff.

Not by choice.

Messing around with plumbing (aka hydraulics) in an old dwelling is like touching a house of cards: disturb any part of it and the rest goes to shit.

The same could be said about old people.

Which is why I avoid doctors whenever possible.

Relates: Almost everything connected to the damaged sink (faucet, risers, compression valves, traps, gaskets, dishwasher drain hoses, etc.) ended up getting replaced as well.

Related relates: Because as soon as I tried to remove them, they went to shit.

Elates: Only two trips to the hardware store, no cracked/chipped tiles, and (thus far) no water coming from places where it shouldn't.

Lates: Ten hours ago I told my wife, "This shouldn't take long."

Ates: Only a glass or four of booze. Primarily because I'm still a bit apprehensive about using the dishwasher.

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