Byproduct of Getting Old

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flashback
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Re: Byproduct of Getting Old

Post by flashback » Wed Oct 08, 2014 5:53 am

Get the colonoscopy done. There are very competent people out there to do it. A patient of mine is in his mid fifties and has less than a year to live after his discovery of colon cancer, it has spread to many distant sites. Hard to tell, but if he had had the colonoscopy done a few years earlier as recommended there may have been a different outcome. Very sad to hear his story, a very nice gut who will be greatly missed.

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SOBF
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Re: Byproduct of Getting Old

Post by SOBF » Mon Oct 13, 2014 4:02 pm

MMMMMMMMMMMM Miralax purchased. can't wait to start my clear liquid diet tomorrow. Vodka is clear right ??

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Deadwestern
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Re: Byproduct of Getting Old

Post by Deadwestern » Tue Oct 14, 2014 7:24 am

SOBF wrote:MMMMMMMMMMMM Miralax purchased. can't wait to start my clear liquid diet tomorrow. Vodka is clear right ??


The prep is the worst part.

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SOBF
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Re: Byproduct of Getting Old

Post by SOBF » Tue Oct 14, 2014 11:00 am

The prep is the worst part.
This is my sixth one and you are correct. Love me some Versed.

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brownsville
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Re: Byproduct of Getting Old

Post by brownsville » Tue Oct 28, 2014 3:53 pm

Deadwestern wrote:
The prep is the worst part.
d'ya think so?

just got the letter, and thanks to being a subject of the utopian socialist queendom of limeyland I get it for free at 55 onwards

there is, however, a telling cultural difference in the process

got to love the word 'poo', and the quizzical look



Image


an hour before leaving home? should be a breeze



Image

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flybug.pa.
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Re: Byproduct of Getting Old

Post by flybug.pa. » Wed Oct 29, 2014 10:27 am

Dr . reports gall stones. fucking awesome.He wants to operate and go get them. However i am doing a do-it- yourself purge this weekend while i am not working.
i learned this from youtube. there is all kinds of medical stuff on there that you can do at home. like brain surgery. on the kitchen table.

truth is i have not felt good all summer since i stopped running due to tearing a glute and tendon. so after this gallstone /liver purge / youtube directions video and all goes well, i am back at it.
If you end up with a boring miserable life because you listened to your mom, your dad, your teacher, your priest, or some guy on television telling you how to do your shit, then you deserve it.
- Frank Zappa

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Lenny
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Re: Byproduct of Getting Old

Post by Lenny » Thu Mar 12, 2015 5:22 pm

I need to bump this for my inaugural colonoscopy next month.

Feel free to share more tips, do's, donts, horror stories anything.

Tight Lines
"Get back home where you belong, and dont ya run off no more"

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kish
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Re: Byproduct of Getting Old

Post by kish » Wed Mar 18, 2015 4:11 pm

Even though I was sedated and don't remember much, I vividly remember the words of the attending nurse halfway through the procedure. Halfway up my ass I could tell the doctor stopped for something. I think I hear him say "hmmmm…" Then clear as a bell, through my drug induced fog, I hear the nurse say, "What is THAT?!" as if she were Sigouney getting her first glimpse of the alien.

Not what you want to hear, but it turned out to be no big deal.

And no….it was not a dead gerbil.
“We act as though comfort and luxury were the chief requirements of life, when all that we need to make us really happy is something to be enthusiastic about.” Charles Kingsley

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west_jay
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Re: Byproduct of Getting Old

Post by west_jay » Mon Apr 06, 2015 5:17 pm

west_jay wrote:I'm 53.

You almost had me at "Ass cancer is a nasty way to die."
Then three pages of this :vomit
Christsakes. Modern medicine, indeed.

[posted Oct. 16, 2012]
Well, it didn't take too long to come around to getting this done.

Two months ago, Apr. 06 seemed like a good a time as any to get violated. Day after Easter didn't occur to me, so I had poison for Easter dinner. Upside was it was nice enough to open the windows.

Not much to say, that hasn't already been said, except that urinating out of your ass is not a natural occurrence, unless you have a pesky case of cholera. Getting those "involuntary" muscles to cooperate takes some getting used to.
You'll have plenty of opportunities to practice.

Verdict: Four pollywogs discovered, on they're way to the lab. My anus feels like I have stitches.
I never met anyone named Joel that wasn't a complete knob. – CharlieJenkem

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flybug.pa.
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Re: Byproduct of Getting Old

Post by flybug.pa. » Sat Apr 11, 2015 4:04 pm

Welcome to old.
If you end up with a boring miserable life because you listened to your mom, your dad, your teacher, your priest, or some guy on television telling you how to do your shit, then you deserve it.
- Frank Zappa

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Lenny
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Re: Byproduct of Getting Old

Post by Lenny » Mon Apr 13, 2015 5:52 pm

Tomorrow is my debut rectal violation, cept for that time at camp when I woke up with my underwear around my ankles and Crisco ...... anyways. It was the nicest day we've had in 7 months. Good to get outside on the deck, 4 paces away from the shitter.

Im fukkin starving right now, cant imagine how hungry I'll be tomorrow after its done.

Be good to get it over with. The anal urination thrill has worn off. And low sodium beef Broth sucks.
"Get back home where you belong, and dont ya run off no more"

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fatman
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Re: Byproduct of Getting Old

Post by fatman » Tue Aug 11, 2015 4:50 am

impotent.jpg
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My drinkin' days are over; I'm still trouble bound - Slaid Cleaves

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