A Confession

All threads that bitch about new, existing, or old members will be posted/relocated here. Keep this shit off the General forum, because no one wants (or cares) to hear your opinions. Now go back to the other forums and post something worthy of reading.
User avatar
austrotard
Posts: 9998
Joined: Thu Dec 06, 2012 2:24 am
Location: the austrocity exhibition
Contact:

Re: A Confession

Post by austrotard » Fri Jan 10, 2014 9:27 pm

confession: what the fuck.

relates: "this video is not available in your country"

elates: luckily I've memorised every line from apocalypse now. even the line when the water buffalo karks it.

vietnamese 1: okay. you hit him, mate.
vietnamese 2: all right then, you hold the bastard tight.
whack!
water buffalo: fuck me. my hind socks don't match.
we'll always have buffalo, sweet josh.

-mtice

User avatar
Average Joe
Posts: 2739
Joined: Mon Feb 27, 2012 3:04 pm
Location: Where they rip out the trees and name streets after them.

Re: A Confession

Post by Average Joe » Fri Jan 10, 2014 9:58 pm

The other night I purchased an international calling card, and tonight I crawled inside the brandy bottle and decided to call the Austrian.

He sounds nothing like he types.

User avatar
austrotard
Posts: 9998
Joined: Thu Dec 06, 2012 2:24 am
Location: the austrocity exhibition
Contact:

Re: A Confession

Post by austrotard » Fri Jan 10, 2014 10:24 pm

we'll always have buffalo, sweet josh.

-mtice

User avatar
RFA
Posts: 7206
Joined: Thu Jan 24, 2008 11:16 am

Re: A Confession

Post by RFA » Fri Jan 10, 2014 11:04 pm

The fucking guy left me a voicemail once......

"Raffa (giggling and pausing), what the fuck mate hey, let's give us a call and we'll...(unintelligible garbled shit)"


-Mitch


not making it up.
As it turns out, God? He was a squirrel. A big 'ol meaty one. "I found god, he used to say"

User avatar
austrotard
Posts: 9998
Joined: Thu Dec 06, 2012 2:24 am
Location: the austrocity exhibition
Contact:

Re: A Confession

Post by austrotard » Fri Jan 10, 2014 11:52 pm

confession: there's an out of control bushfire burning roughly one mile from my house.

relates: http://www.perthnow.com.au/news/western ... 6799611267

elates: I can smoke what I like today. if I can find it in the haze. double entendre!
we'll always have buffalo, sweet josh.

-mtice

User avatar
Hogleg
Posts: 4060
Joined: Wed May 05, 2010 4:56 pm
Location: Over yonder

Re: A Confession

Post by Hogleg » Sat Jan 11, 2014 12:01 am

austrotard wrote:confession: there's an out of control bushfire burning roughly one mile from my house.

relates: http://www.perthnow.com.au/news/western ... 6799611267

elates: I can smoke what I like today. if I can find it in the haze. double entendre!
Family.

God (Rochester).

Tweed.

Tiger Maple project.

In that order.

Godspeed my friend.

Just make sure the Tiger Maple project makes it...
"girls with eating disorders will usually let you come in there in butt." -Jhnnythndr
"...my grandmother’s Tang always tasted like rusty water and dirty socks." - Average Joe
"with some limited exceptions steelhead live where the lady selection is sparce." - MTG

User avatar
austrotard
Posts: 9998
Joined: Thu Dec 06, 2012 2:24 am
Location: the austrocity exhibition
Contact:

Re: A Confession

Post by austrotard » Sat Jan 11, 2014 12:23 am

tiger myrtle.
if you keep saying tiger maple I'm going to give it to d-wayne.

confession: everything I own is near the front door. it's her doing for a quick eviction...

relates: it's too hot to smoke.
we'll always have buffalo, sweet josh.

-mtice

User avatar
B.M. Barrelcooker
Posts: 3396
Joined: Tue Mar 30, 2010 7:57 pm
Location: Aintry

Re: A Confession

Post by B.M. Barrelcooker » Sat Jan 11, 2014 10:49 am

Silly question .....

Do they really have miles in Austria ?
"worst that can happen is a big fat zero and a fine walk out of doors"---Chadroc

User avatar
Hogleg
Posts: 4060
Joined: Wed May 05, 2010 4:56 pm
Location: Over yonder

Re: A Confession

Post by Hogleg » Sat Jan 11, 2014 11:23 am

austrotard wrote:tiger myrtle.
if you keep saying tiger maple I'm going to give it to d-wayne.

confession: everything I own is near the front door. it's her doing for a quick eviction...

relates: it's too hot to smoke.
I had a hyper-religious, bible thumping aunt named Myrtle. Perhaps my mind has suppressed that name from my memory banks altogether.

I'll try to do better Mitch. I promise I will.

Let's try it:

Myrrrraple.

Damn.

I'll keep working on it.

Stay frosty mate.
"girls with eating disorders will usually let you come in there in butt." -Jhnnythndr
"...my grandmother’s Tang always tasted like rusty water and dirty socks." - Average Joe
"with some limited exceptions steelhead live where the lady selection is sparce." - MTG

User avatar
B.M. Barrelcooker
Posts: 3396
Joined: Tue Mar 30, 2010 7:57 pm
Location: Aintry

Re: A Confession

Post by B.M. Barrelcooker » Sat Jan 11, 2014 5:45 pm

Confession. I just saw a car crash complete with blue lights and ambulance in a McDonald's drive thru.

By the time I got home I am convinced it was a flashback of some kind.
"worst that can happen is a big fat zero and a fine walk out of doors"---Chadroc

User avatar
austrotard
Posts: 9998
Joined: Thu Dec 06, 2012 2:24 am
Location: the austrocity exhibition
Contact:

Re: A Confession

Post by austrotard » Sat Jan 11, 2014 6:34 pm

B.M. Barrelcooker wrote:Silly question .....

Do they really have miles in Austria ?
I brought some with me from engerland.

bilingual bastard, me.
we'll always have buffalo, sweet josh.

-mtice

User avatar
RFA
Posts: 7206
Joined: Thu Jan 24, 2008 11:16 am

Re: A Confession

Post by RFA » Sat Jan 11, 2014 7:00 pm

They definitely have donuts.



kidding, twat.

I was walking down the street in Fort Collins this afternoon, fresh from lunch and 2 beers/shots at my favorite restaurant (the one we met at, Mitch). I heard an older couple behind me talking.

Him: "There are two things in this world that suck: You and your fucking dog"

I am guessing he was the one who sucked. I didn't feel like getting into a fight...again, so I let it go.

Relates.....I haven't shaved/trimmed my beard since September......most people looked at me like I was going to ask them for money, the fucking peasants. I should have thrown dollar bills around to prove my worth.

Cookie Puss was discontinued....seriously upset....even though Carvels aren't in Northern CO.

As it turns out, God? He was a squirrel. A big 'ol meaty one. "I found god, he used to say"

Post Reply

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Majestic-12 [Bot] and 362 guests