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User avatar
By Average Joe
#616195
He does, but that's not much different than picking up some meat at a store.

I was under the impression that in order to enter this swap you had to personally kill whatever you jerked.
User avatar
By Hogleg
#616200
We'll make a special exception for you because you are so average but also "get it" and possess unique culinary skills combined with an ambition and a "I don't give a fuck" attitude that transcends all human understanding.

You're in man. Bring it.

I'm updating page one with you standing in for BM who has a two or three freezers full of deer but has "never done jerky".

So it shall be.
User avatar
By Hogleg
#616273
pxatim wrote:My meat is hitting the smoker tonight and will be in the mail Monday.
That is a big fat lie.

Monday is one of the 32 Holidays observed by the postal fucktards.
User avatar
By Average Joe
#616278
When I got to work this morning, I read this thread and thought, "I can't believe BM bailed on this swap."

Followed by, "Holy shit. How in the hell did I get roped into this?"

Anyway.

Earlier this evening I found this in my freezer. I know that there's only one place it could have come from, so I called the Old Man and said, "Hey Dad. That meat you gave me. What the fuck is it?"

"What do you mean, 'What the fuck is it?' It's fucking meat."

Fair enough.

This is what you're getting.
NOT FOR SALE.JPG
NOT FOR SALE.JPG (985.8 KiB) Viewed 1984 times
But there's no way in hell you're going to have it by February 16.
User avatar
By Hogleg
#616279
Average Joe wrote:When I got to work this morning, I read this thread and thought, "I can't believe BM bailed on this swap."

Followed by, "Holy shit. How in the hell did I get roped into this?"

Anyway.

Earlier this evening I found this in my freezer. I know that there's only one place it could have come from, so I called the Old Man and said, "Hey Dad. That meat you gave me. What the fuck is it?"

"What do you mean, 'What the fuck is it?' It's fucking meat."

Fair enough.

This is what you're getting.
NOT FOR SALE.JPG
But there's no way in hell you're going to have it by February 16.
Looks delicious.

We'll give you until the 18th since you're a short notice stand in. Use the waffle maker.
User avatar
By SnuffBox
#616303
Jerkings have been jerked and will be posted when said agencies report for duty.
Also, I used my "Ol' Reliable" recipe, which has no nitrates, but plenty of other sodium species to be mostly less risky than properly cured meats.
Are we to include the recipe?
Image
User avatar
By Hogleg
#616307
Outstanding.

Recipe not required. So far no one else has included the recipe with what I've received.

Also, I've been a good boy and not sampled anyone's except mine. If I get good and jrunk that could change quickly though.
User avatar
By fatman
#616314
Average Joe wrote:"What do you mean, 'What the fuck is it?' It's fucking meat."
NOT FOR SALE.JPG

Gold :smile
User avatar
By Average Joe
#616318
I removed the veil from the mystery meat today, and this is what I found.

I'm pretty sure it's pig, and given the fat content I'm guessing it would probably go rancid within an hour of leaving the dehydrator.
no bueno.jpg
no bueno.jpg (1016.8 KiB) Viewed 1880 times
A road trip to Mendocino is now on tomorrow's agenda.

This is all BM's fault.
User avatar
By Hogleg
#616321
I'd ask him for gas money if I were you. At the very least. He's culpable.
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